Question: How do I get over a failed relationship or the fact that I loved them more than they loved me?
Let me just say it’s not easy, especially when you feel like you were the one who stuck your neck out. You loved, you lost, and now you’re longing for closure. I think the first step is to accept it. Stop trying to make it not a thing, because fortunately or unfortunately it is a thing! MEAN! No, HONEST. Come on I love ya, I just had to cut to the chase to make a point. Accept what is in order to get over it because we can’t move past something we refuse to admit is real.
Now that you’ve accepted your current reality, next thing to do is to stop ruminating over what went wrong. If it’s helpful, write down all of your thoughts. See them on paper, clear them out of your head. Read them, accept them, and then get over them. Why? Because it is what it is. Easier said than done Lauren. I get it guys, but is it not true? The moment is what it is. You will go damn near mad trying to change what you have no control over. We can’t control other people from their thoughts to their actions. When we accept our current realities we can begin to let go and make space for what’s to come.
Let’s get something straight though, I am not here to tell you not to be sad. You are absolutely entitled to feel however you want to feel, but if we want to mend and get on with our lives it’s going to take acceptance, honesty from yourself and a willingness to create a better life. Try and see the good: What did you learn about yourself? About the type of relationship you want? The type of partner that you feel will be good for you?
You are human, it’s okay to feel but it’s also important for you to remember that you are capable of moving on and creating a new life. You take it day by day and so maybe you take a few steps forward, a few steps back, but you keep going! It’s hard to see it now, but all of this change is happening in order to make room for something better. You my friend are a badass, so smile even when you don’t wanna, focus on the good, and be grateful that what is meant for you is currently on its way.
Until next time my loves,